The Chicken crossed the street

Many times I am really surprised how the western countries make a big hue and cry over small matters. Recently there was news in the papers about how a chicken in Scotland crossed a street and how the city authorities actually noticed this.
It so happened that a lady driving a car, noticed a chicken scurrying in front of her car. Startled, she applied the brakes instantly. Now, the lady drivers in Scotland are very law abiding citizens, they are either applying nail polish or are playing detective in trying to trace the elusive Pokémon’s or they are indulging in that harmless activity called Mobile chatting. But this lady was different. Perhaps she belonged to the bygone generation. She applied the brakes, took her car to the sidelines and dialed the authorities.
If it had been India, perhaps the chicken would either have been crushed under the wheels or would have ended up on some driver’s dining table. And in India, all animals cross the roads, that too when the driver is least expecting it, whether it is a chicken or a stray dog or cattle, on a busy city road or cattle or elephants in the south. In Thane, where I stay, the stray dogs are the kings of the roads, it is their territory, the cars have to either slow down or take a long detour around the dog, so as not to disturb the sleeping beauty. Recently I had been to the city of Udaipur. There the roads belong to the cattle, who occupy the best shaded and airy part of the road, and the cars have to drive around the cattle. That’s why our Driver faced great difficulty in finding a shaded parking spot since it was usually occupied by a family of cattle. When we asked the driver about this, he stated very matter of factly that the cattle occupy the roads to avoid mosquitos in the dark tabelas. On the roads, due to the cars and trucks going by, no mosquitos dare sit on them during their siesta time. That day I came to know that the drivers of Udaipur are so empathetic, they care about the mosquito bites on the cattle. Perhaps some entrepreneur should come out with a contraption, which sprays the inside of a car with perfume and the outside with a mosquito repellent. Guys, I am just trying to say that animals, whether bi-pedal or quadruped, are common on Indian roads, and what happened in Scotland, can never happen in India.
Anyway, coming back to our story, as soon as the lady in Scotland called the city authorities, a police car in the vicinity was at the spot, in a jiffy. And 4 policemen were immediately down on their haunches to catch the culprit, the modest chicken. The lady was honoured with the ‘STAR of the MAYOR’ for her exemplary kindness towards all living things. But the last I know, 4 policemen together were not able to capture the chicken. Perhaps they were chicken hearted policemen.
Yatindra Tawde

The singing mice

There are many birds who sing beautiful songs, and I am not talking about the crows and pigeons. I was in Udaipur recently and was very fortunate to, first hear the beautiful cry of the peacocks and then see his elegant dance in the wilderness. The myna birds, are very common in Thane, and my wake up callers. Almost every morning some myna birds, make it a point to come to our balcony and sing the entire range of their opera. After all these years I am able to identify their different types of tenor, of course, without understanding the meaning. And if you go to such exotic places like Mahabaleshwar, you meet many other singing stars with their varied singing styles.

But I was shocked when I heard that the mice sing too, just like birds, so says new research. But to our good luck, this singing is in a high pitched ultra sound tones, which humans cannot hear. I shudder to imagine, if humans were able to hear this singing…

We humans are sleeping in the night. The friendly neighbourhood dogs are having their barking competitions. A few dogs barking from the opposite locality are answered with equal fervour by the dogs in our locality. A few home-bound dogs join in the fun to add to the already loud cacophony. Suddenly two cats decide to challenge each other with hissing and screaming. And the mice try to win over new mates with their screeching singing. As it is, whatever sounds uttered by mice are very uncomfortable to us, I cannot imagine how their singing will be. But looking at the innumerable mice occupying the sewers, and their propensity to multiply their numbers, if we were able to hear their singing, I am sure it would drown out all other sounds in the human aural range.

So folks, I am going to sleep now, with assurance that my sleep won’t be disturbed by one more loud sound, other than those generated by fellow animals who already occupy not only the roadside but are stars of the social media as well. And I am grateful that the mice are not on social media otherwise their singing would make them sure fire singing stars and YouTube would have cute singing mice in addition to naughty kittens and puppies.
Yatindra Tawde

Pint Yoga

There’s new enthusiasm in the air. The men folk are excited, looking forward to their yoga sessions. The laziest of couch potatoes are now leaping with new vigour. The wives have pushed their husbands since long, to join Yoga classes, with little success. But now things have changed for the better.

Rakesh is a financial wizard who slogs throughout the week, his day starting at 6.30 am. and ending at 10 pm. He hardly gets time to exercise, neither in the morning nor in the evening. Work pressures force him to sometimes skip lunch. He keeps uneven eating hours, totally focused on his work. And the weekends are spent in lazing around the house and enjoying his beer sessions with his buddies. This unhealthy lifestyle has taken its toll and he suffers from hypertension. His beloved wife, Simran, keeps pushing him to take up exercise but with zilch success. And similar is the case with many other households in their locality.

One Saturday night, Rakesh comes home a little high and tremendously excited. Enthusiastically, he tells Simran about his plan to join a Yoga class next day. Simran is pleasantly shocked! She is not convinced but decides to humour him. Next day she wakes him up, early in the morning. “Rakesh, don’t you have to go to yoga today? Rise and shine!”. After half an hour, the king has still not woken up from his slumber. “What happened to your yesterday’s resolution? Why are you still in bed?”. Rakesh then mumbles about going in the evening. “Who does Yoga in the evening. Are you in your senses.” But no amount of threatening or cajoling disturbs Rakesh from his siesta.

Come evening time and Simran finds Rakesh ready with track pants and all. And he is unusually enthusiastic. He reaches the yoga gym with a spring in his step. The yoga session starts with the usual deep breathing exercises. It then proceeds to simple stretches. Then the serious asana’s start. And then it happens. This is what has pushed so many men to suddenly take a liking for yoga. After a set of every 3 asanas , a glass of beer is served. Some mumbo jumbo about how beer is good for the system, is served by the new age Guru. The Guru himself is demonstrating a very unique and complicated asana. Standing with his feet together, he lifts his leg backwards and in the same fluid motion arches his back, lifts one of his hands, tilts it backwards, touching the tip of his finger to his toe. And this is not all; in the same motion, he picks up a glass of beer with his other hand, takes it above his head and pours the contents into his throat. Then he starts demonstrating more asanas , the level of difficulty going up, but all the asanas are accompanied by a glass of beer. All this while, the students are reaching their higher levels of consciousness, thanks to the madira. After 2 hours, everyone is satiated, the students due to obvious reasons and the Guru, due to the fact that he had been able to loosen their purse strings.

Rakesh returns home where he is given a traditional welcome by his doting wife. She sees that her husband’s cheeks are unusually flushed and there is a radiance on his face. She is very happy to see this change in her husband.

Now guys, this is not a rambling of an idle mind but a very likely scenario since this has already started in the US of A, where people are always trying to bring some variety to anything they do, to overcome their boredom in any routine activity.

Yatindra Tawde

A Dog’s Life

To study dogs smartness, owners learn new tricks, I read somewhere. So the world has turned a full circle, and instead of the dogs, the owners are learning new tricks instead of the other way round. Nowadays universities have Canine Cognition Centres and Yale University is one of them. Owners try to find out how smart their dogs are, so they push their dogs into participating in such centres. And these centres then grant diplomas to the participating dogs. And these diplomas are bachelor’s, master’s and doctorates. And the owners earn brownie points and bragging rights in Social circles.

My name is Rocky and I am not a human. I started staying with Sumaira’s family, in the USA, since I was a pup and she was a small child. She was and still is my best friend. When she was sitting in her pram, I loved playing with her and licking her face. In fact, I loved lathering the faces of all humans in my house, with my saliva. Her parents took good care of me and they too loved me a lot. I was served the choicest food, it was a tradition for me to sit below the dining table, eagerly looking for food morsels, which the family was kind enough to share with me. I was bathed every day by Sumaira’s father and involved heavy foam on my body, every two days. Oh! How I loved to play with the foam. And those walks on the campus were bliss. I loved to watch the falling leaves and being surrounded and petted by Sumaira’s friends. Sumaira’s father would throw a ball, and I would be off in a jiffy to fetch it for him. But surprisingly he didn’t like the ball, and would throw it again. But I did not like to lose it, so I fetched it again. This went on for a while, which made me lose my patience as well as my interest. So I would just sit with my tongue hanging out of my mouth. My days were very well spent in all such leisurely activities. Then two things happened, Sumaira started going to school and her father changed his job, now he had to go to further off places for work purposes. This made him tired in the evening, and he no longer took Sumaira and me to the playground. I started spending more time lazing around the house and disturbing Sumaira’s mother with my crazy antics. In the evening, I started hearing her complaining to Sumaira’s father that I am one dumb dog, how I don’t do any tricks, so on and so forth.

Once there was a get together at the house and Sumaira’s father’s friends alongwith their families had come over, and there was a great racket around the house and I really enjoyed playing with all the little human pups who had come along. It was a great evening spent after a long time. But through the corner of my eyes, I had noticed that Sumaira’s mother surrounded by other ladies looking at me and discussing something. But I did not take much notice and continued enjoying myself with the kids. Next day I was to discover!

Next day started early. Once Sumaira and her father left, her mother showered extra attention on me. In a sing song voice, she said, “Common Rocky. Today we are going to rock”, and then she took me in her car to a far off place, with a big lawn outside. It was a great imposing building with, what humans call, the Greco-Roman architecture. Upon entering inside, my paws were sliding on the smooth as silk floor. I just loved the feeling, and tried to run but was of course restrained by the mother. We then entered a room, where I was given some simple tasks to try out, by a very stout human. After every task, to my delight, I was given mouth watering snacks. I started looking forward to more tasks. After a gruelling session of 2 hours, the stout man told the mother that I was being admitted to the institution. Oh! How happy she was. The next few weeks, this became a routine. I was learning many tricks and my treats were getting better and better. How I loved this lifestyle.

The D-day had arrived. The entire household was now with me in the Greco-Roman building. But there was a difference. Here I was, sitting separately on a pedestal along with many of my own ilk. Whereas the humans were there, making up the audience. My head was held high, avoiding eye contact with the ordinary humans. Yes, ordinary. After all, we the blue eyed denizens of the doggy world, were today sitting on a pedestal in front of the human race. I was so proud when my name was announced, “The next winner is Rocky”. And what was then said, changed my life forever. I was “Doctor Rocky!”

Nowadays I get impatient very fast. After many days, Sumaira’s father took me to the grounds again. He started that stupid game of throwing the ball. Once or twice I fetched it for him, but then I thought, if he doesn’t want the ball, why should I bring it back to him and waste my energy. No, I wasn’t going to repeat such silly acts now. After all I am smart now. A doctor, Doctor Rock, not Rocky the happy go lucky dog. I no longer sit below the table. Now I try to grab a chair for myself, after all a doctorate deserves a higher ground. The family did not like it at first, but now they accept me as their equal. Previously, when Sumaira was back from school, I used to dance around her and make her pet me. But now, I have realised my foolishness and don’t make a scene of myself. I try to maintain my dignity. But when Sumaira or her mother or father, take out the box of puzzles , the IQ Treat box of puzzles, I love to solve those puzzles which are then followed by awesome treats. The family is now getting slowly trained to my new requirements, and I like to be given my space.

So folks, let your dogs remain dogs, don’t try to make them smarter. Or one day, you won’t get such a wonderful welcome once you get home, tired from work, by your loyal loving doggy. He will start showing signs of the Teenagers sickness, a know-it-all personality replacing a love-you-all personality. Don’t say I didn’t warn you, or you would start leading a dog’s life.

Yatindra Tawde

Bullet Train

Mumbai-Ahmedabad will get a bullet train. From where will it be flagged off from? A date will be decided but will be indefinitely postponed. Why? A controversy will erupt, on who will flag off the inaugural train – whether it will be a Gujarati or a Maharashtrian . Finally a truce will be reached and decided that it will be flagged off by both. Now, where will it be flagged off from – Ahmedabad or Mumbai. For obvious reasons, it will be flagged off from Ahmedabad.
I understand that the bullet trains of Japan run at more that 300 km/ hr. Will they run at the same inhuman speeds in India? Lets suppose it does, then what precautions need to be taken…i think, first and foremost, it will need a dedicated elevated line, to avoid, any animal from crossing the tracks, especially the bovine kind, who are treated as sacred… We don’t want any protesters from holding up the bullet trains.
So the D-day arises. The timings of the train are fixed for the train to start its maiden journey from Ahmedabad at 7.30 am. The station is all bedecked in flowers, beautifully decorated. The bullet train itself has turned up at the station like a coy wife , getting ready for her wedding. The station is teeming with people. There are 3 types, those who have booked tickets in black, to be the pioneers who sat in the very first bullet train in India, others are the relatives and friends, who have come to drop off their loved ones, and the third type, are the sundry onlookers, who have just come to ogle at the train. They are all waiting for the inaugural ceremony with bated breaths. The politicians arrive for flagging off the train, sharp at 8.30 am. The people are happy, that, for once, they have come on time, 1 hour being nothing, if you consider the larger picture. Time comes for cutting the ribbon ceremony. And here everything goes wrong, making the train idle at Ahmedabad station for the next 3 hours!
The delay arises due to the controversy – who will cut the ribbon first, Maharashtra or Gujarat, driven by inflated egos. The railway babus, try to pacify both sides in vain. Some of the egotist start feeling hungry. The entire group, from both sides, retire to the railway canteen. The railway babus, grab their chance, and counsel both sides to reach to an agreement.
Finally both sides reach the front of the bullet train… There 2 ribbons are waiting to be cut, one by each group. The ribbon cutting ceremony passes off peacefully, with both parties then, embracing each other with put-on warmth in front of the preying eyes of the cameras, which are in huge numbers.
With a great toot of relief, the bullet train then commences its journey between the 2 great cities of India. Keeping in mind, the gastronomical likes of the passengers, the pantry car has made arrangements, for a continuous supply of phapda-jalebis, dhoklas, khakra, misal pav, vada pav, poha, et all. With their taste buds continuously occupied, the first travellers on the Indian bullet train never realise how the time passes, and by the time, they have had their umpteenth snack, the have reached Mumbai station, which is again festooned in balloons and decorations, and where a sea of people have gathered to welcome the Japanese marvel.
So the journey, which might have taken 3 hours in Japan, has taken 8 hours in India, thanks to the inauguration ceremony. It’s a victory of Indian tradition over Japanese innovation.
Yatin

Smart House

Nowadays all builders compete with each other to offer smart houses to their customers. Each new smart facility offered, the customer gets burdened by one more crore. No house is now available below a crore or two.
One day a DINK couple, who were in need of a abode to call their own, went to a reputed builder’s office. Now don’t ask me what is a DINK couple; it’s DOUBLE INCOME NO KIDS, sillies! They were ushered into a plush office. Like a goat who is offered the choicest grasses to eat, before it is butchered, similarly the couple was offered the choicest wine 🍷. The DINK were impressed!
The Sales Representative of the builder, in impeccable English, floored them with the list of amenities, on offer. In addition to the usual amenities like a enviable club house, table tennis tables, badminton court, a tennis court, pool table, a fully furnished gymnasium, and a Olympic size swimming pool, what clinched the deal for the DINK, was the offer of the SMART HOUSE. They requested the sales representative to show them their dream house. That’s when the fun started!
When they, along with the sales representative reached the door of the smart flat, an energetic wave 🙋 by the sales representative, with a big smile on his face, opened the door of the flat. The couple was looking at him quizically, when he replied, “A scanner is installed on the door, which scans your smiling face and detects the wave movement. When you move into the house, all the existing master data in the scanner will be deleted, and your smiling face will be saved in the scanner. And we will teach you the proper wave movements”. Still reeling from this information, the couple followed the salesman inside. Once inside, the salesman clapped once and the lights came on. He gave them the information that, clapping once puts the lights on & clapping twice shuts off the lights. And when you want to just enjoy, like on weekends, you perform a jig, which starts the disco lights. We will teach you the jig, when you make the down payment.
The DINK couple was feeling flustered and a little hot under the collar. They requested the salesman to put on the AC. The salesman promptly went to a corner and winked! Immediately the AC came on. Then he showed them how to increase or decrease the room temperature… You twist your fingers in clockwise direction and the temperature will increase and anti clockwise to decrease.
Feeling a little weak in their knees, they looked around for a place to sit… there was non. The salesman sensed this, he extended his hand towards a wall and did a pulling gesture…a sofa started pushing out of the wall!! Seeing this, the couple just plonked themselves on the sofa. The man was thinking, “how I wish I get a cup of tea 🍵”. Immediately, from the direction of the kitchen, a shadow emerged! This was a robot, which was a cross between R2D2 and Chewbacca (Star wars fans will know). This contraption was carrying a steaming cup of tea! “This is the clincher in this smart house. Your own butler, who never sleeps and always at the mind call… You think of any requirement, and he appears like a genie”. The DINK couple is zapped… Both of them were thinking, what will happen if I have some romantic thoughts. They shuddered to even think about it.
Suddenly the man got up, and asked for the way to the loo. As he entered inside, the lights came on. OK, this was normal… But, then the pot cover went up and “Welcome! Please use water sparingly. After ‘download’, please delete your history. No one else should have access to your history. Thank you for using me”. On hearing this, all thoughts of ‘downloading’ vanished from the man’s mind and he rushed out. He asked the salesman, “can we mute the toilet?”. Unfortunately, this facility was not available.
After looking at the entire house, as they were exiting out of the house, the door ejected a very pungent odour. Confused by this, the lady asked, “now what is the meaning of this”. The salesman behaved as if he had not heard. So the man asked the same question again.
This time the salesman cleared his throat and answered, “The SMART HOUSE has identified you as very dumb, and rejected you as its owners”
So folks, say good riddance to SMART HOUSES and save your sanity.
Yatin

The Smart Car

I remember an old movie named, “The Car”. It tells the story of a mysterious car which goes on a murderous rampage, terrorizing the residents of a small town. It was a Hollywood movie and I had loved that film.

But now it seems that the cars in America have turned over a new leaf.

Well, literally!!

Recently an old lady, driving a car in Florida got involved in an accident. Actually it was a hit-n-run case and this particular lady was the culprit. She was all set to drive away from the scene, but all her plans went awry… Thanks to her own car!! Well, this happens only in America and how! Now read on…

All thanks to the great American obsession to give even the minutest possible safety features to its citizens, a 911 assist facility is in-built in most new cars in America nowadays. And the lady in question was done in by this very facility.

It so happened that immediately, on impact, the 911 facility on the car – which was paired with the lady’s mobile- made a missed call to the police. When the police called back on the number, the lady did not answer. But hey, what’s the big problem? If the car owner does not answer the phone, then the car takes over. And so it did…

The car, via its Assist facility, connected with the phone, and taking the help of the GPS facility inside the car, gave the car number as well as the location coordinates to the police… in no time, the police were at the spot and arrested the lady. The lady was shocked by the sudden arrival of the police.

She had been unaware about all that had transpired between her own car and the police. I think, when she finally realises it, she will file a case on the car manufacturer for infidelity.

That’s the price a man has to pay if all his possessions are smart like a smart phone, a smart car, a smart watch, etc, etc… And he himself remains dumb!

Let’s see what happens when such cars are introduced in India…a certain movie director , who is obsessed with kissing cars, dancing cars, et al, will next introduce a infidelity car whereas another director will be too happy to blow up such a car, like he does in each movie of his.

Some movie stars, who are prone to car accidents, will never buy such a car whereas some people, who drink and drive, will pour their drink on the assist facility inside the car, so that it doesn’t tell tales on them.

But then this issue might never arise in India, since the calls placed by the car, will , in all probability, go unanswered…

Yatindra C1 Claws Club

Are Women from Venus

Women are from Venus

Just read the newspaper article that men hear from one side of the brain whereas in women, both sides of the brain are involved. This gives them the enviable power to read between the lines, hear things which might have been left unsaid since both sides of the brain enrich their creativity. Ah!! That explains the following innocent conversation between me and my wife.

I am engrossed with the scourge of modern life, which is the smartphone, when the wife initiates the most important conversation, that is, for her.

The first question is asked, “Have I grown fatter?” If that is not a googly, I don’t know what is. Gearing up for a long drawn out session, I keep my phone aside. That’s half the battle won, or so I think. Now she is one of the slimmest ladies but this question she must ask. I stay silent.
“Answer me, have I grown fatter”.
“No, not at all”
“I know you are saying this only to make me feel happy”
“No, no. I am serious. You really have not put on much weight”. Alas! The wrong words have escaped my loud mouth. I bite my tongue.
“Much weight! That means I have put on some weight no. I know you always tell lies only to make me feel better. But sometimes truth escapes your mouth, like it did just now”
“Noo! I did not mean it like that. I mean, look at so and so, you are nowhere near her. How can you say you are fat? You are not at all fat. You are not even plump. You are still the same like you were when we married.” Wicket gone!
“Men are like this only. Always comparing wives with other ladies. Your eyes are always roving. I hate you. I see it in your eyes that you consider me fat.”
I don’t like where this conversation is going. I think I should keep quiet now. So I smile feebly, trying to reassure her, trying to keep my arm around her shoulder. But it is shrugged off.
“Now why are you silent now?”. The question is asked. And answer too is given immediately. “I know why you are silent. You are silent because what I said was right. Was I not?”
“But you are only talking. You are not letting me speak at all”
“Yes, yes. I am only wrong. I am a dictator know. Don’t speak to me”. And she marches off, to fight another day.
But today I came to know the reasons for this, the two sides or two hemispheres of the lady’s brain. It would have been great face-off but for only one hemisphere of my puny brain.
Folks, what I have just written is all from one side of my brain, the involved with a little creativity, or you will go and complain to my wife!

Yatindra Tawde

Mind Readers

Research says “Women are very good at mind reading”. I am surprised this required research at all. After all, it is such a common occurrence, why waste money on research. Any husband will tell you how his wife reads his mind perfectly.
But why should I write about other people. I will share my own experiences.
Starting with an innocuous but regular occurrence, whenever I take up some extra domestic work, that too on a weekend, my wife reads my mind with mind boggling accuracy, “Which cricket/football match on TV today?”. I used to be surprised in the beginning, but now I am used to it.
Returning home with my wife, the slightest of slowing down of the car, is detected on the radar of my wife’s brain. “You should not buy beer today, today is so and so festival”. Wow! How does she do it. In the time spent together so far, I have now come to know of the unknown festivals of India, which she uses to deny me my single can of beer. I may be having it only once in two-three weeks but for her I am a drunkard, who has to be weaned away by all possible means. But what is stunning is, the reading of mind, due to slightest of reduction in car speed.
On weekends, as soon as I start making myself slightly more comfortable, she senses that I am preparing to doze off. That’s called sixth sense. Suddenly she remembers to buy those household things which won’t make a difference, if not bought. There is no emergency but then it prevents a husband from enjoying his two winks.
But reading of my mind attains it’s highest levels of accuracy when I am channel surfing. Any beautiful moment on TV, like for example Baywatch and the like, and the antennae are extra sensitive. Same is the case when we are in Goa, and I am admiring the foaming sea. But I not at a fault if some other type of natural beauty are in the foreground. However, the thoughts are sensed and all efforts are made by the wife, to distract me from such diversions.
So Scientists should not waste the public money on such common sense topics like mind reading abilities of women and they should concentrate on finding ways to block such capabilities.
Yatindra Tawde

 

Hairfall!

In 2012, the umpteenth James Bond film, “Skyfall” was released but I was more concerned about my hairfall.

In my childhood, my mother struggled to style my hair in the innocent way mothers style their child’s hair, trying to give a side parting to my stubborn spikes, which stood straight up from my pate. And over a period of time, though she could not discipline me, she managed to discipline my hair, so much so that I could never give it another style. In my teens I tried so hard to give it a middle parting like a Bollywood hero, but to no avail. Finally I gave up, and lived through my younger years, with a side parting. Though it is very difficult to imagine now, I could grow my mane quite long in those days. But though I desired long hair during school days, when the PT Sir cut my hair since it was a puny 1 cm. too long, by the time I was a young working person, I could not tolerate long hair, due to the sweating, especially during the hot summers. Alas! How short sighted I was, little realising that there would come a time, when I would run short of the very same hair on my almost bald pate and it would hardly require any cutting.

While I could run my fingers through the hair to tidy it up or blow air from my mouth with a slight tilt of the chin, my lower lip slightly pursed on one side, delivering a blast of air to the mane above, impressing girls in the bargain, a small patch of cleared up area started forming on the crown by the time I reached my mid thirties. It was my daughter who first pointed it out to me, drawing a circle on my head with her small fingers, to indicate the cleared up area. As the years went by, the small patch had become like a helicopter landing area, increasing in diameter. First, it was not visible when I looked at myself in the mirror, hence it did not much bother me. But slowly and surely, the cleared up area started coming into prominence in the mirror, throwing me headlong into searching for advertisements. Yes advertisements, promising a full head of hair. Sometimes I thought of reaching out to Dr. Patra’s and sometimes to take the benefit of robotic hair transplantation. Sometimes Harsha Bhogle inspired me while sometimes it was that unique person in the advertisement, who took great pride in showing the top view, side view and front view of his own head, before and after the miraculous treatment. Believe me, I appreciated the different views, for the first time in life, so many years after completing Engineering drawing where all such views were the norm.

Why I mentioned “Skyfall” is due to the Debonair Daniel Craig, who Inspite of having an almost bald pate, is the epitome of an Alpha Male personality. And so is Jason Statham, the Salman Khan of Hollywood. Now don’t get me wrong, I am not comparing myself with these excellent entities, but only trying to boost my confidence and saving some hard earned money for rainy days. Hence, like some of the other males, I no longer give any tips to the neighbourhood barber, for cutting my almost non-existent hair. It is done by yours truly with the help of a trimmer, by looking at myself in the bathroom mirror. Believe me, it’s a liberating experience!

Yatindra Tawde